Challenge: Write an even WORSE Cain story for D3 than the devs!

[DickScotchfist]

Is it possible to write an even worse Cain story than the "Butterfly Death" we were given? Would love to see others' attempts. Here's mine:

HERO: Cain! You're back!

CAIN: Yerp!

HERO: Cain, listen... there's something you need to know.

CAIN: I have to go now. My planet needs me.

[CAIN levitates up and away, out of screen never to be seen again]

TEXT ON SCREEN: NOTE: CAIN DIED ON THE WAY BACK TO HIS HOME PLANET.

[nurman]

"Still better love story than Twilight"

[Tomsch]

"Stay a while and listen, aaaaaaaargh" (heart attack)

[Cpdoom]

Is it possible to write an even worse Cain story than the "Butterfly Death" we were given? Would love to see others' attempts. Here's mine:

HERO: Cain! You're back!

CAIN: Yerp!

HERO: Cain, listen... there's something you need to know.

CAIN: I have to go now. My planet needs me.

[CAIN levitates up and away, out of screen never to be seen again]

TEXT ON SCREEN: NOTE: CAIN DIED ON THE WAY BACK TO HIS HOME PLANET.

Simpsons ey?

[DickScotchfist]

Simpsons ey?

Good man! Though I thought this would be blatantly obvious to anyone who grew up in the nineties. Yet in three forums with my post, youre the first to get it.

[themeros]

Hero: Cain, I'm here to save you!

Cain slips and falls into the meteor hole while running from the Skeleton King.

Hero: Not again, Cain... Oh wait... he's dead.

[Kiroptus]

Hmm... I could think of something worse, but I dont think I had to change too much of what is already there, its bad enough.

[SuggestiveName]

It turns out that the Horadrim are simply a sub-group of the League of Shadows. Cane and Leah Al Ghul hold Sanctuary in fear with the Worldstone modified to be a world-destroying bomb. It gets a little weird with Cane and Leah Al Ghul getting far too touchy-feely, but then Magdah shoots Cane with a motorcycle gun and he dies. Batman flies the Worldstone about 100 feet off shore before it detonates, which apparently is far enough to save everyone. The end.

[MathewPoland]

You find Cain's body in the crater. It turns out that the meteor killed him.

[DickScotchfist]

You find Cain's body in the crater. It turns out that the meteor killed him.

Lol. {these are more characters}