I'm not going to claim this as the best build out there. I'm not going to tell you I'm slaughtering Act 3 or that this build will get you through Inferno with crap gear. What I will say is that after experimenting with various skills and builds discussed in this forum, I settled on this as my current favorite. My gear has some significant deficits (a side effect of being an adult with a full time job and baby), but this build gives me a satisfying killing speed and a way of dealing with tough elites that has allowed me to finally start progressing through Act 2.
Fists of Thunder (Thunderclap)
Deadly Reach (Keen Eye)
Lashing Tail Kick (Sweeping Armada)
Sweeping Wind (Cyclone)
Mantra of Conviction (Overawe)
Passives: One with Everything, then pick two out of Seize the Initiative, Resolve, and Transcendence. I'm using StI and Resolve, but could see switching Resolve out for Transcendence if I had some other LpSS (I currently have none) to stack with it.
This is, obviously, a hybrid offensive/defensive build, but it differs from some others in that the defense is not based on rotating Cooldowns. If Serenity wasn't so useful, I'd probably go for no Cooldowns at all.
Two things that inspired this build were my general dissatisfaction with Blinding Flash and Breath of Heaven as defensive skills, and my belief that offense is always helpful (trash mobs get cleared faster, dangerous elites have less time to kill you) while defense is situationally helpful (i.e. when incoming damage outpaces your base mitigation and healing). So, all else being equal (and it's not equal with the passives, since all the good ones are defensive), I'd want "always on" offensive boosts and "available when needed" defensive boosts. Hence this build.
In-Your-Face Offense: FoT-TC is, IMO, simply the best offensive attack in the Monk's arsenal. It will generate the most spirit (aside from spirit-on-crit runes, which require giving up other benefits), the most healing from LoH, and the most crits for creating cyclones. You enhance FoT with SW-Cyclone and MoC-Overawe, which are the Monk's two biggest damage boosts (you want high enough crit chance to proc those cyclones, obviously). For trash mobs and relatively non-threatening elites/champs, these three skills are all you need.
Tactical Defensive Mode: When you face tough elites and your hp starts to drop faster than you can heal, that's when you bring in the tactical skills. DR-Keen Eye will allow you to hit stuff from outside melee range and keep fighting while kiting and avoiding plague/desecration/etc. spots, and the 50% armor boost is HUGE. IMO it's as good as the defensive mantras (essentially 2.5x the mitigation of the Time of Need or Hard Target runes), but you can use it just when you need it and without having to forfeit the damage boost from MoC. The next tactical skill is LTK-Sweeping Armada. I didn't really appreciate LTK in Inferno until one of my early attempts to kite a dangerous group of fire-chain champs in Act 2 resulted in them out-running me and splattering my internal organs across the desert sand. LTK is now my "get the F out of my face" skill and it works well as a partner to DR. DR + LTK is simply a great combo for fighting (relatively) safely without having to rely on a handful of cooldowns. Of course, the final tactical skill in our arsenal is Serenity--the one cooldown that is an absolute must-have no matter what the rest of your build. You generally want to save it for when you get CC'd on a spot that will kill you, but if you're confident in your survival then you can also use it offensively (i.e. pop Serenity and refresh MoC, then get 4 seconds of pure damage with FoT.
I'm not going to go in-depth on gear. Obviously you want to stack crit chance for Cyclones, and once your crit chance is high then crit damage can provide a huge DPS boost. Dex, vit, all resist and a consistent single resist for OwE are all of obvious importance. Beyond that, I'll just say that armor is extra beneficial because of the boost from Keen Eye, and I think it is highly beneficial to stack multiple of types of healing. You'll get the most out of LoH and lifesteal while you're on the offensive, stacking some life regen will allow you to heal up when you're in DR/LTK "Tactical Mode", and LpSS (especially if you opt for Transcendence over one of the other defensive passives) will give you a controlled heal.
As I said above, I'm not going claim this as the ultimate Monk build, but it has provided me with a playstyle that I'm enjoying and finding effective. I hope you'll try it and post your comments. I'll end this by saying thanks to thehealthygamer for popularizing crit chance + cyclone as something to build around, and to everyone else who has posted build ideas or other helpful information here.