I don't believe it. OJ let us down, the "real killer" struck again!
In a related story, violence has broken out between those that believe Elvis was the wheelman and those that insist Mario of MarioKart fame drove. The police could not be reached. Neighbors said they didn't care.
In a related story, there was a robbery at the local Krispy Kreme store. The SWAT Team was called in as well as every K-9 unit in the tri-state area.
In a related story, Krispy Kreme stock gained 300 points today.
In other news, a dog exploded today. No humans were injured but hundreds of fleas lost their lives. Donations are being taken at the Raid factory.