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Raistlin Majere
27-04-2005, 04:55
A WEST NYACK, N.Y. MAN was found dead at his computer apparently the victim of trying to keep up with too many professional forums. Childress H. Wanamaker, 54, an account executive at a New York-based new media company, died of starvation according to the West Nyack coroner's office. Wanamaker's emaciated body was found by Loraine, his wife of 26 years, who told MediaPost she had been bringing her husband meals on plastic trays for weeks, but that he never took the time to eat them. "He was glued to his computer 24/7," she said tearfully. "He was so afraid he was going to miss an opportunity to contribute a comment or start a discussion, that he just stopped eating." She added that Wanamaker's last words were "OK Picard, stick that in your pipe and smoke it..."

Computer forensic specialists from SUNY at Cortland discovered that Wanamaker was subscribed to 48 different forums and networking communities including one apparently having to do with the elderly called "oldtimers" and another apparently limited to just 100 people. They also found that he posted a comment into one forum or another on an average of two per minute every hour of the day for the past seven weeks.

"He felt under terrible pressure to be part of the online community," said his son, Lucian, who says he tried several times to get his father's attention and lure him away from the computer. "The only time he even looked up was when I told him I had seen Dane Madsen trying to steal his car out of the driveway."

Police found what appeared to be an organization chart taped to the wall of Wanamaker's den with lines linking small photos of people unknown to the police including a Tom Hespos and an Adam Boettiger. Neither is considered a suspect in Wanamaker's death.

"Once, I thought I had him," said Lucian Wanamaker, "when I said that mom had made cookies, but half out of his chair, he just sat back down mumbling something about two Roman gods; I believe it was Jupiter and Atlas having some sort of titanic battle. 'Let them eat PIE,' he bellowed banging on his keyboard."

Computer forensic specialists reported that there was no order or continuity to Wanamaker's forum postings. "It looks like he just sort of randomly commented on whatever was in the discussion string at the time," said Stephen Hall, CUNY-Cortland adjunct professor of intemperate and impulsive behavior. "He let nothing go by unchallenged by his own point of view, nor failed to respond to any other community member asking for advice or a new job. This consumed not only 24 hours a day, but also, apparently, his physical health."

In what must be a record, Wanamaker was linked into to over 15,250 other community members, many of whom he exchanged notes with daily. He also contributed to 375 blogs and was expected to start an online column about the impact of interactive communications on health, when he died.

A virtual memorial service will be held online at a date to be determined.



Linky
(http://publications.mediapost.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=Articles.showArticleHomePage&art_aid=29415)

A friend sent me this. Now if you will excuse me, I will be exploring that place with no ceiling.

Amra
27-04-2005, 04:59
His family should have done an intervention.

:creep:

cyclotronic
27-04-2005, 05:04
His family should have done an intervention.

Ash, would you come in here for a sec? We need to talk about something.

th5418
27-04-2005, 05:10
Ash, would you come in here for a sec? We need to talk about something.
I think that is Ash. :(

Ash Housewares
27-04-2005, 06:31
Kirk>Picard

AeroJonesy
27-04-2005, 06:34
He's alive!

IDupedInMyPants
27-04-2005, 06:55
Really. Explore the place.

corax
27-04-2005, 07:11
"oh look mum dad is starving himself to death again"

why the hell wouldnt you just yoink the guys computer.

unless its a conspiracy. OMFG LOOKOUT ASH!!!!

Jigga-Scrooge
27-04-2005, 07:20
i wonder how the wife didnt notice all the uneaten food.

Ash Housewares
27-04-2005, 07:23
i wonder how the wife didnt notice all the uneaten food.

possibly because it was imaginary

Yaboosh
27-04-2005, 07:59
possibly because it was imaginary


Huh? Why would his wife give him imaginary food? Shouldn't she be charged with negligence at least?

5Ws
27-04-2005, 13:12
...Newman anyone?

~Kazama Fury~
27-04-2005, 13:20
Damn you 5Ws!!!! BEAT ME TO IT!!!

Admit it everyone, when you read the article you thought Newman.... then maybe Ash.


A man with a wife half his age wouldnt give her a time of day, instead posts comments?

Beowulf
27-04-2005, 13:26
That is kind of scary. They said he had a job but was he on leave or something to be posting so much? As mentioned I think an intervention would have been in order.

Ash Housewares
27-04-2005, 13:31
Damn you 5Ws!!!! BEAT ME TO IT!!!

Admit it everyone, when you read the article you thought Newman.... then maybe Ash.


A man with a wife half his age wouldnt give her a time of day, instead posts comments?

the first thing I thought was "bull ****" and that's still what I think

Savage
27-04-2005, 13:43
Damn you 5Ws!!!! BEAT ME TO IT!!!

Admit it everyone, when you read the article you thought Newman.... then maybe Ash.


A man with a wife half his age wouldnt give her a time of day, instead posts comments?
I think the 26 years refers to how long they were married, not her age :D

~Kazama Fury~
27-04-2005, 13:47
the first thing I thought was "bull ****" and that's still what I think

You don't have a say in this!


... but yeah, what you thought did cross my mind... at one point. I am sure I thought Newman first though. :lol:


edit: Savage: Ugh that would make so much more sense... *feels really stupid now* thanks -_-

Dolph
27-04-2005, 14:20
In my opinion it si nothing but sad, whole family seems to be very stupid.

Meh, im going outside to practice some Diabolo. Sunny weather today

Take care.

DougTheHead2
27-04-2005, 15:00
These last couple replies make me think not everyone gets the joke...


THAT ISN"T REAL

Newman
27-04-2005, 15:18
His family should have done an intervention.

:creep:

Okay, this is what is going to happen to me.

skihard
27-04-2005, 15:22
wow newman I was begining to worry it was you, thanks for dispelling that worry.

dantose
27-04-2005, 15:31
These last couple replies make me think not everyone gets the joke...


THAT ISN"T REAL
Dude, just becasue it says "satire" on the page doesn't mean it's fake! :cheesy: :bonk:

Newman
27-04-2005, 15:38
wow newman I was begining to worry it was you, thanks for dispelling that worry.

My name is Stuart. Not whatever that other guys name was.