farting bob's top 5 Funniest monsters

[farting bob]

Hi! sorry its a bit later than usual this week, but im kinda busy / lazy and couldnt think of anything good to do. but that problem is sorted, so i will begin.
Since the dawn of time, there have been big scary animals that kill you in such ways you would rather not know about. There are also small, often furry looking creatures who you laugh at... then they kill you in such ways you would rather not know about.
Both these types are in the diablo world, but the top 5 for this week mainly comes from a tbhird group. they dont look klike they can rip your voice box out from 20 paces, and in reality, they probably couldnt at any number of paces.
So this poll is to find the funniest monsters, for any reason (appearence, stats, general oddness etc).

Fallen
Ahh yes, those annoying red devils that generally give you exp up to lvl 3, then it seems pointless to kill them, when they provide such entertainment. You hit them, they run away squeling. You kill 1 of them, and they all run away squeling. They walk around in large numbers, but if you even look in there general direction, you guessed it, run away squeling. And the amount of damage they do, it just feel like being tickled, so extra points there.

Hell bovines
MOOOOOOOO. The common cow is a peaceful domesticated animal, used by man for food, drink and mowing the grass. But somewhere in the evolution a new breed came about. these were 2 legged axe weilding killing machines, and these are the ones im talking about. The first sight of them is enough to send even the most constipated grumpy old man into fits of laughter, and then the sound. A master stroke by Blizz there... Need i say more about these?

Yetis
And all the big furry monsters that are based on them. The ones in the frozen river are my favourites, because there big, white and furry, and they glow blue when using a holy freeze merc. Yes, there tough, but yes, they also look like they could cuddle you all day and make a great pillow.

Fetishes
My god are they annoying some times, but the 2ft high jungle inhabitants are some of the funniest things in the Diablo world. Complete with a 3ft long butchers knife (which just defies logic how they hold it) or a pea shooter (which is the kind id say should be on the list) in herds of 20 or more, these things are funny. Not ot mention the shaman, whcih is jsut 1 of these guys (still clutching the butchers knife) and a enormous decrative mask. But if you kill the mask bearer, a second dude pops out and madly assaults your ankles.

Quill rats
You didnt think i'd leave out the faithful quill rats did you? normally the first thing you find when you first venture out into the blood moor. The spikey creatures are odd indeed. ignoring the fact they do no dmg to anybody wearing more than a cracked sash, and ignroing the impossibilty factor of them dropping polearms despite being hedgehog size. ignore the fact that they die in 1 or 2 hits most of the time. Then, and only then, will they be less funny.

So there you go, vote for whcih you think is the funniest D2 creature. Poast what you voted for, why, any suggestions or disagreements with my list.

[GooberGrape]

Hell Bovines, followed closely by Yetis.

I like anything that dies in a huge pile of fur with a loud BBRRROOOGHHH like he tripped and fell.


GG

[Dacar92]

My vote goes to Fallen. They sound like Beavis from Beavis and Butthead and they always make me chuckle.

[bill_n_opus]

Fetishes
My god are they annoying some times, but the 2ft high jungle inhabitants are some of the funniest things in the Diablo world. Complete with a 3ft long butchers knife (which just defies logic how they hold it) or a pea shooter (which is the kind id say should be on the list) in herds of 20 or more, these things are funny. Not ot mention the shaman, whcih is jsut 1 of these guys (still clutching the butchers knife) and a enormous decrative mask. But if you kill the mask bearer, a second dude pops out and madly assaults your ankles.


I don't think many people know where the whole thing about Fetishes come from .... check out this link.

http://www.retrocrush.com/scary/49.html

... and then check out Retrocrush's top 100 scariest movie scenes of "all time". Pretty entertaining read for sure.

http://www.retrocrush.com/scary/

[skunkbelly]

I think the Yetis would be perfect, if only they said, "I'm gonna love him and squeeze him and call him George!" like Marty the Martian's big hairy pet in the Bugs Bunny cartoons :flip:

[mrflippy]

So this poll is about which monster has the largest butt?

[ahcw]

I voted for fallen because they always crack me up when they yell stuff like "rakinishu" and then run away when I kill one.

Hell bovine is a close second though for sure.

[Hrus]

Hell Bovines definitely. MOOOOO.
2nd would be fallens. (Do they scream "Bishibosh" and "Calenzo"??)

[Dave in the basement]

I had to go with the cows, although your description of the Fetishes almost pushed me in that direction. Tis a shame they are so annoying! :lol:

Dave :teeth:

[necrolemming]

Funnest monster = Lister.

[nobo]

[x] Fallen

the funniest things in d2 :thumbsup:

@Fetishes: arent fetish shamans 2 fetishes? i mean 1 fetish has another on his shoulders, and that fetish has that big mask...
so when you kill the mask bearer, the 2nd fetish starts attacking you with its butcher'S cleaver :lol:

[Howitzer Al]

Gotta be the cows. Now the fetishes have made me chuckle on occasion, but the first time I ever did the cow level, my brother-in-law and I just guffawed until we were crying. Can't beat that.

[bradley_turner]

reziarfg r teh m0ts funnierest monsta!

followed closely by hell bovines

[Ahab]

What about the teleporting monkeys in Act V, with their little coats, I'm thinking the Blizzard guys were doing a nice tribute to Wizard of Oz.

[kabojjin]

I like fetishes even more now. Using rabies on them is good stuff. The little fellas run around like crazy infecting 30 something of their friends in the process and then they all die and leave me tons of low levels runes and gems. Hilarious to watch those twitching little poisoned corpses.

[DX-Crawler]

I like it big and hairy :scratch:

Yeti gets my vote

DX

[JicamaEater]

I think Imps are the funniest, if not also the (second) most frustrating monster in the game to hunt down packs of (expecially if Dac Farren has FECELE :scared: ) if they can actually be considered to be packs...For those who haven't noticed (since plenty of people wouldn't kill them if their social lives depended on it :lol:, though the "problem" is much more pronounced on Bnet) the Imps do a little "somersault" when they teleport. It cracks me up all the time.

Of the choices I must choose Fetishes. They are hilarious! I especially love shamans. When you shatter the shamans they will still bring a little fetish out of the corpse. Even better is Witch Doctor Edungu since he explodes. And Champion Flayer Shamans = ownage. That's 16 potions and heaps and heaps of gold!

[factotum]

Got to be Yetis, especially the way their corpses look like a comfy sofa. With feet.

Quill Rats are really funny, until the moment you step onto the Blood Moor in Act 1 Hell in 1.10 for the first time and you get killed by one...

[Summoned]

For those who haven't noticed (since plenty of people wouldn't kill them if their social lives depended on it :lol:, though the "problem" is much more pronounced on Bnet) the Imps do a little "somersault" when they teleport. It cracks me up all the time.
That brings back memories of my former MA assassin in act 5. Charge up level 1 blades of ice and dragon flight an imp right when it's about to teleport. If it's not dead yet, it'll be frozen in mid-air, upside down. :lol:

[corax]

OMG COWZOOORS (http://diabloii.net/columnists/lions-toes01.shtml)

cows get my vote on this one. even though i dont have sound so i cant hear the moos anymore :hanky: i still remember them

[Crazy Runner Guy]

I remember the first time I entered the "Secret" Cow Level. I couldn't stop laughing. I still laugh at the damn things.

crg

[Mage11]

Cows. I still remember back when the Secret Cow Level was something new, you'd walk in, and then there'd be these cows with their big axes, making their funny moo sounds. You'd laugh hysterically, and then they'd hit you. Hard. And you'd die.

And you would wonder with them all packed in so close, how could you possibly survive. Then came the LF zons and they lost all their mystique and weren't so funny any more.

Still get my vote, though.

[jiansonz]

I voted fetishes. I find it funny that they try so hard to sound scary with their "ablelelele!" battle cries.

But I like the Lashers even better. Bondage gear, they scream "come on!", they have some disgusting sounds, especially when they die. Flux described their death animation as "skin first, then bones" which is pretty accurate.

[whomhead]

fallens. one word: RAKANISHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

[ricrestoni]

Now I must bring some honorable mentions:

- The funniest name award: Sucker
- The "our fountain never dries" award: Drowned Carcass
- The "we don't have an art designer available" award: all bees in the game
- The really quick appearance award: those exploding slaves
- The neat yet useless award: those monsters that always run out, never attack and impregnate other monsters, so that when they die, a glowing newt sprouts to attack you.

Enough mentions. My vote? Cows, of course!

Moo Moo Moo Moo-oo

[DurfBarian]

I'm going to have to break ranks and vote for zombies, especially when they are moaning "braaaaiiiiinnnnss"

[Arem]

I'm going to have to break ranks and vote for zombies, especially when they are moaning "braaaaiiiiinnnnss"


That's what I was thinking too. I ended up voting for cows. The fetishes were funny right up until the started killing my (admittedly horrible designed) sorceress in nightmare. That was way back in the classic days.

[Disco-neck Ted]

One that can be very amusing is the Urdar. When being attacked they fling their arms wide and lean back*. So when suffering the jabs of an act II merc, it looks for all the world as if they are being tickled under the arm by the wiggling spear tip.

Rat men are funny in act I.

Overall, though, cows get the award hands down.




*No, they do not do the rockaway.

[bartekwoda]

From that list: da hell bovine.
But where is diablo - the big red doll that looks like an overgrown but still cute puppy?

[Stargaze]

Of those in the list: Fetishes, definitely. For their Shaman (it's two Fetishes, one upon the other) and the sound they make when attacking with oversized knifes.
Of DII: The Swarms I'd say. For the looks and the ability to pull Full Gothic Plate Armors out of their imaginary sleeves.
Of DI: I always had to laugh because of the goats that did spin around when dying.

[factotum]

Of DII: The Swarms I'd say. For the looks and the ability to pull Full Gothic Plate Armors out of their imaginary sleeves.


I think it's a lot funnier that you can kill a swarm of thousands of insects using a poleaxe. I mean, what are you doing--using it as a giant fly swatter? :)

[Malachi]

Fallen indeed. I still wonder who Rod is (Rod Zombie maybe ?) when they call for him (or did I hear that wrong). And I could swear they shout 'sh*t' when they run away (again I could have heard it wrong).

EDIT: Dont forget Fallen seem to be the only polite monsters too since they say 'Hello' before they start to attack.

[Drandimere]

I have to go with Fallen here. My wife thinks that I'm nuts - but I swear I've heard these guys talking a few times - more than just "Rakanishu".

Specifically, I was running through part of act 1 on Hell searching for the Countess on a new map I rolled (trying to get the waypoint closer). As I ran past a large group of Fallen some of them were running behind me and I SWEAR I heard them say in that funny little voice "there she go... she run... she always run..." Either that or I was REALLLLYYYYYY tired that night.

[jgreg7]

Fallen get my vote, because of the way they mutter to themselves like grumpy old men and die with a spectacular spin... then get up to do it over again! Fetishes are a close second, but they are just annoying enough that they aren't so quite as funny.

[DougTheHead2]

I was kinda thinking Urdars too, I really like the idea of them hitting me with a corpse wrapped in chains. Big fat guys swingin' at tiny little men, Fee Fii Foh Fum!

[corax]

to take this a little OT fallen remind me of the small covenant in Halo. the little ones that scream ''run away''.
Also a funny halo story. me and my bro were playing the 3rd level(where u start with sniper rifles) and we snuck close to a group of baddies and i hurled in a grenade. and i said to my bro ''grenade''(we warn each other to get clear) then one of the big blue dudes shouted"NOOOOOOO" and promptly exploded. now that was a funny monster.


Urdars are pretty funny. I never though they were until someone mentioned the corpse wrapped in chains. then they were hilarious

honorable mention should also go to enslaved type monsters for putting their 'assests' (http://www.battle.net/diablo2exp/monsters/act5-minion.shtml) into the swing. look veeeery close

[JicamaEater]

honorable mention should also go to enslaved type monsters for putting their 'assests' (http://www.battle.net/diablo2exp/monsters/act5-minion.shtml) into the swing. look veeeery close You know, I wouldn't be very suprised if GFrazier added that to the graphic really quick before he put it on the page just as a joke. Maybe I should go kill some of those m@#$^$%^*%as. :D


...there she run...she always run... That is by FAR one of the funniest things I have ever read on this forum. I'd be willing to bet you were really tired.

I often don't play with the sound on (the people I live with (my family I mean...though I spend much more time with people at my school) think that it's obnoxious (haha, live with, how funny is that? Probably not very...).

[RTB]

to take this a little OT fallen remind me of the small covenant in Halo. the little ones that scream ''run away''.
Also a funny halo story. me and my bro were playing the 3rd level(where u start with sniper rifles) and we snuck close to a group of baddies and i hurled in a grenade. and i said to my bro ''grenade''(we warn each other to get clear) then one of the big blue dudes shouted"NOOOOOOO" and promptly exploded. now that was a funny monster.
Did a monstersession Halo yesterday and everytime I went up against a group of those I just had to laugh. You open a door, throw in a grenade, let the door close, and then you hear in a high-pitched voice: "Grenade!". Just as it goes kaboom you open the door and see two small covenants flying. Priceless.

Fallen get my vote as D2's funniest monsters. Extra Fast vs Frenzy = speed battle :evil:

[Leinad]

The exploding slave dudes are the funniest for me. Especially when they do their gurgling sound AFTER exploding!

[vajurewi]

Im gonna go in a different direction and say - GoatClan.

I love those guys - they make goat sounds when you kill em.
killing bunches of them in the Arcane is the only thing redeeming about the place - they're like movie theater popcorn - you pop them off in handfuls, thinking you are getting satisfied (ie XP), but ultimately they are just empty fillers. :clap:

[steelsixtyIV]

I remember the first time I entered the "Secret" Cow Level. I couldn't stop laughing. I still laugh at the damn things.

crg

I'm with CRG on this poll, pure comedy seeing Cows die. MOOooo!