Funniest Item Found

[snapper316]

Anyone else have a suggestion for the funniest item name?

I do, yesterday I found a Shillelagh.

I was like, wt heck is this.
Never heard of it or had seen it before.

So its a sorc staff, and it had 2 sockets.

So i made a nice LEAF runeword out of it.
Can anyone think of any other funnier names of items? Just thought i'd post this somewhere, and how funny the item name was.

[Artimus20]

Pus Spitter's kinda funny..

[cOMMANDo]

the giant conch

everytime i find one of those it cracks me up, cause i read couch instead of conch

look baby(my wife) i found another giant couch, good thing to, cause killing all those monsters was making me tired

[Frogboybri]

the giant conch

everytime i find one of those it cracks me up, cause i read couch instead of conch

look baby(my wife) i found another giant couch, good thing to, cause killing all those monsters was making me tired

That one's even funnier if you speak spanish. Ask somebody what concha means.

The Frog

[hittitian]

It should be very smelly. And, thats why it gets that annoying chance to cast level xx poison nova.....

[Singollo]

i found a rare wand called "Imp Crack" once, and a rare monarch called storm shield

[Holla]

lenymo sash is the best/funniest

[oscarmk1]

Anyone else have a suggestion for the funniest item name?

I do, yesterday I found a Shillelagh.

I was like, wt heck is this.
Never heard of it or had seen it before.

So its a sorc staff, and it had 2 sockets.

So i made a nice LEAF runeword out of it.
Can anyone think of any other funnier names of items? Just thought i'd post this somewhere, and how funny the item name was.
I have seen quite some Shillelagh however its defiintly a rare item. There should be a unique one.

[nubikoen]

I once found a rare monarch too - Eagle Horn
Kinda odd.. :)

[chubbypuppy]

everytime i find one of those it cracks me up, cause i read couch instead of conch



Glad I'm not the only one who thinks he keeps finding a couch!

[Lyrs]

I once found a rare monarch too - Eagle Horn
Kinda odd.. :)

I found a crossbow with that name also. now, which one of us was more disapointed? :lol:

[Shade]

Russet Russet Armour (preferably to be personalised by a char named 'Russet' afterwards...)

Crown of Ages

[Paladuck]

The world's first homosexual weapon, the Mancatcher.

[theBlackKnight]

Bing sz wang

criante vomir ( blatent vomit ) (( looked it up on a french translator))

[kryo]

The one and only Spiked Shield of Spikes! (Now with 50% more spikes for your spikey pleasure)

[Jesse_124]

Cruel Bastard Sword.

[mugentim]

"The Diggler"
DIRK <--------unique dirk

Boogie nights !!

[ƒenris]

Berzerker's Bererker's Berzerker Axe of Berzerk O_O
Too bad no zerk charges.
I saw Mike_Tyson's string of ears once, that was good.

[Holla]

ok dracoy holds the funniest personalize his guys name is Dracoy Skrew's
Dracoy Skrew's Arreats face
Dracoy Skrew's Deadcorpse

[AwesomeDude]

I once saw, on West, Jagged's Jagged Jagged Star.

[decoy_sJ]

my vote goes to the most elite unique out there..Lenymo's sash. :buddies:

[labyrinth]

Here's 2 blues I found:

- Bahamut's Walking Stick of the Vampire
- Mechanic's Ancient Armor of the Squid

[negator]

one time the old IRON JANG BONG dropped near a unique goat man named BLUE BALL.

[puckalicious]

I can't be the only person that's found a Collossus Girdle? Never found a magic one so there could be some funny names there.

[Loboleal]

That one's even funnier if you speak spanish. Ask somebody what concha means.

The Frog

Hehe, true. But that concha is used in Mexico and other spanish people in South America.
Here in Spain, concha is not used that way.
Spanish version of Diablo items is even funnier. The translation of some of them is the worst I've ever seen in my life.
Skullder's Ire = La ira del hacedor de craneos.

If some spanish speaker reads this, sure he'll laugth.

[Indemaijinj]

Heh, I found a yew wand with +1 Poison Dagger.

[YomoKimyata]

For some reason my buddy Kris (who does not play this game and had no idea what i was talking about) didn't appreciate the screenshot I sent him of my Weird Kris of Simplicity.

I am still laughing at the cruel bastard sword. And I think the giant couches should only drop from those big furry guys in the ice caverns, who kind of look like big couches when they are dead.

[AuraAllan]

Biggin´s bonnet

Kuko Shakaku ... Say it really fast. Great fun.

The meat scraper

Suicide branch

And i once saw Grim´s Grim´s Burning dead Grim Scythe.

And the ever so funny Cruel Bastard sword.

~AuraAllan~

[Kdawg]

Deadly holy water sprinkler of the ox.

:yep:

[Sir Smeagollum]

Lance of Yaggai is funny
I've seen in my times on d2 a lot of uniques with the names "Snot Drinker", "Snot Eat", or "Pus Bite".

[Killfrenzy]

The phase blade of self repair!

Generals Tan Lo Di Ga, or whatever the hell its called

I've seen Imp Impaler before

and any fan of warhammer 40k will love the "imp guard" targe

ive also seen a Massive Giant axe (how big IS it?)

[Indemaijinj]

Heh, Giant Threshers are also somewhat funny with their stupid name.


Let's see:


Threshing (the verb) is the act of beating harvested grain to seperate the oats from the chaff. This was in past times accomplished by using a farming implement called a thresher or a flail, two wooden sticks connected by a small leather cord.

It is from this practice that the two modernly used verbs "threshing" (or more commonly "thrashing") and "flailing" referring to violent uncontrolled bodily movements.

The military flail as well as the nunchako are both military iterations of this common farming implement.



Well, my point is that "giant thresher" would be a nice name for big mean flail, but is sorely misleading when used abouth this big scythe-like thing. They got the whole "farming implement turned weapon" thing right, but frankly they do not know much about archaic farming over at Blizzard North.

[snapper316]

haha, dang when i posted then yesterday never thought i'd get so many replies.... yay to noob snapper posting.

Hmm, I like all the posts.

Favorites have to be:
1. Couch
2. Cruel Bastard Sword
3. Mike Tyson's String of Ears...very nice
4. All those personalized funny ones. Think of Wizard spike's wizard spike maybe. anything like that.

As for the Low-points of the post..

1. Whats funny about lenymo? booooo.
2. Is there really anything funny about a yew wand with +1 to psn dagger.
3. Thats about it :)

For the record, i made a hardcore character called WontDieVerySoon. kinda funny.

[squigipapa]

2. Is there really anything funny about a yew wand with +1 to psn dagger.

psn dagger, imbunes your 'dagger' class weapon with psn, if you're using a yew wand you're not using a dagger now are you :) basically just a useless mod.. :) ..

I've seen a couple of funny ones over the years..
'Fat's bastard sword' is one of the more memorable ones..

on a side note, isen't it funny the the swear filters on this site don't catch the word bastard. bastard! bastard! bastard! you're a bastard, F you Bastard... :) .. thought this was kinda funny .. maybe I'm just a little sick.. :)

[superdude0526]

Hell Mode: After fighting through mobs of glooms, oblivion knights and Baal's Minions. For all my work Baal dropped Biggin's Bonnet for me! First words out of my mouth were "What the F***!" ...:)

[Dissident]

Funniest I ever found:

the "Bing Sz Wang" Dacian Falx. wtf is that? Seriously?

[Cloud_Walker]

Funniest I ever found:

the "Bing Sz Wang" Dacian Falx. wtf is that? Seriously?

LOL no kidding. I don't understand a single one of those words.

I remember a LONG time ago when I first saw a Cow King's set piece I started crackin' up. Couldn't believe they actually made from cows lol.

[AgentPongo]

I think holy water sprinklers deserve a mention here.

[Ryshenron]

Funniest I ever found:

the "Bing Sz Wang" Dacian Falx. wtf is that? Seriously?
why thats the leader of north korea :)


wait nvm..thats kim il sung

[jeeb123]

Definatly the Holy Water Sprinkler. I think it's a pally weapon with the skills and stuff like that. I think it should be called Holy Water Tinkler... and what kind of "holy water" is this???

[AwesomeDude]

Bing Sz Wang I think means "King of Weapons" in Chinese.

Holy water sprinkler was actually another name for a morning star, but when it was used as a holy device, they would dip it in holy water and use it to sprinkle things with the water.

[funnelweb2]

Bing sz wang

criante vomir ( blatent vomit ) (( looked it up on a french translator))
Crainte Vomir means Fear to Vomit - but yes, it's a very strange name for a sword.

[Superhal]

Holy water sprinkler was actually another name for a morning star, but when it was used as a holy device, they would dip it in holy water and use it to sprinkle things with the water.

actually i saw this on the discovery channel...it was a spiked ball attached to a handle with a short chain. it was called 'holy water sprinkler" because it resembled the incense burner carried by priests.

[Purkake]

How about Fat Bastard's bastard sword :D
Or Pussy's cruel claws of butchery

[ahappytree]

never posted here before, but I couldn't resist.

Pilum of propagation.

[Loftarasa]

Every time a "polished wand" drops i geek out.

[AwesomeDude]

I ran across a couple phase blades of the ages earlier.

[Superhal]

for you robert jordan freaks: maiden's spear.

[RaptoranDiablo]

Shadow Killer - maybe to some of you ^^
Stone of Jordan - Jordan of stone...hehe
NagelRing - i guess...
Ribcracker - the cracker of ribs
Frostburn - Frostbite ( i suppose )
Rust(y)handle
StormEye the eye of the storm

eh...i guess some of these are funny,maybe not but its the best i can come up with...heh